There will never be any one that will ever love a break up. Rare moments if you do especially if it so well deserved. It is something that we can never be used to. Sometimes even the person that breaks us up also gets engulfed in the break up blues. It could be that bad. Always that bad.
But what really makes them that bad? What makes a break up one of the most dreaded if not the only feared part of any relationship? Some people will never know. But then how could you not know. Though still if you do not know then this is why you ought to know.
Do you know something called memories?
Remembering of the things you shared together, the things you had planned to do together. Family, dates, property, trips. The relations you had built. The friends that had joined in your inner circle. The ones that only could understand your relationship. The two families involved. Call them in-laws.
To the heart broken, the rare things you saw only in that person and the unique feeling only they could make you feel. How they made you laugh. Easily. How they made you trust. Easily. How they made you forget all your fears and your refuge in the hard times of your darkest hours. The way that person could make love to you. The hugs, the kisses. The touches. Romances. The things you loved of them. The hopes they had built and how you cannot believe that you were living a lie, blaming yourself for having trusted so easily and now that bastard is walking away like that. The gifts you had shared and now you are going to see them almost for a long time of your life. Some you cannot afford to lose. It is not that easy because they are useful. Must admit.
The betrayal you had caused someone that you had at one time made plans with and built so many things together with. The guilt you get when you remember the promises you had made of how you will love that one person for eternity. The guilt that comes from you remembering the people you had impressed and thought that your relationship was the best that others could learn from. The guilt from the hopes you had made someone have and now they have to get shattered because they have to face the next moment of their life understanding that the hopes they had in you are now false. The guilt that drives you into realizing what a monster you are especially if the other person loved you wholly even at the times you treated them like shit and now you see their innocence is getting wrongly paid in return. By you none other than. When you get to lay down with someone else but you cannot forget the best lay that the former could give you.
Your mind will keep playing these things over and over again till you get sick. Memories, shit! That bitch is so deep!
Random Thoughts of Shadray 