It has always led to a cocktail (mostly negative) of public reactions whenever it comes out that a young man has, of all things, wedded an older woman in Africa. In fact, it is considered the other way round. That the woman has wedded the man. It has always been a taboo especially by the conservative traditionalists.
Usually, once a woman is slightly older than a man then she’d be considered as an older sister & if she’s really older than the guy then she’s considered his mother. Grandmother if she resembles a fossil. Anything that crosses to husband & wife is scorned at & boy will you get majority spiteful of your relationship. The females that go for the elder men are not spared either & in whichever case as long as one of them is literary double the age of their partner, then the younger one is considered to be going in it for the money. Probably hoping that the old partner will die & leave them fortunes. Chi-ching.
Personally, I largely believe in the adage that “age is just a number.” Well, if it’s within the range of 10 years. Why? Because of some people’s views about the love issue that deals with age. To some, they say that a perfect relationship can’t work out if partners are in the same age bracket due to their different reasons like & especially relating to power & finance. Me, I beg to differ due to the following reasons:
I am going to take on two sides here; one then the other. I’ll start with the girls.
Girls who believe in this usually back it up with reasons like; if you marry an age mate, there’s going be less development because usually you are both struggling to make it so a girl should marry a person who is older because these have already made & can easily finance everything. Their arguments are usually about money, nothing else & do confess sometimes that they would unfortunately miss out on the good sex from the ‘younger guys’. To the girls, these I conclude that they are usually into money not love actually because, if it is love (real), then they wouldn’t have to worry about marrying the same age bracket guy but since they love the money, they find it difficult to settle with someone who is still working their way up the financial ladder. This often times makes society to see them as misers, gold diggers & or prostitutes. Why? Because, prostituting is giving in one’s sexuality in exchange for something else. So, they are giving in their sexuality for the money. But that’s the essence of it anyways. Does it hurt to work with someone for a stable financial future? Because I have usually noticed that richer girls usually settle down with guys of their own age bracket & slowly work their way to the financial top but it is usually the ‘financially struggling’ girls who always need the easy come, easy kinda money. It is their tendency to be broke, cheap to the older guys and always eyeing the old man’s money. Sorry if I lied.
And to the guys, on the other side, they are usually comfortable marrying within their age brackets especially with the girls who are optimistic about a bright future.
Then there are other guys who front the adage I started with. They believe/ always say that they like younger girls to women of their age bracket. Why? Because they feel the younger girls are easy to control, they fear competition (financial & power) from their same age bracket ladies & so expect the younger girls to be their puppets. This is what the old man always /usually has in mind when the ka-girl shows interest in him. You won’t easily challenge/ question his intellect and as long as he got the dice, you will do his bidding. They also usually have some other girl for back up & to hurt you in case you try to feel good on him. This is so, so that you show him all your loyalty lest he goes to another & you lose out on the money.
He knows you are broke & in a nutshell, you are his ‘tethered goat’…the rope is the money, he is the tree/pole. Get the picture?
On a rather personal basis, I believe age is just a number. You should be free to love whoever but more personally, I don’t mind marrying someone from my age bracket. It is love, not what he/she has made & I am optimistic the future, if worked upon, will be BRIGHT.
In conclusion, if you truly love someone, & you have understood, I have shown you that the girls in support of marrying older men are more so about the financial stabilities & the guys in support of marrying younger girls are usually in support of asserting power and control while those into marrying their age mates are into emotional stability, and possibility of growth together.
…… but each to their own.