To the “As long as you’re happy” brigade, I hope when your daughter brings you such a kind of man, you won’t proudly mind ushering him into the family & showing him off to your people as the man your daughter is settling with without questioning her health, sanity, social & financial security.
However, much as people be chasing their own happiness, it’s very important to help them in the process so that we limit scenarios of ‘singa namanya’ (I wish I knew) & that, my friend, is part of a parent’s duty especially in situations like these.
Allow me to be judgmental here, oh, ye who preach the ‘do not judge others’ gospel.
Your daughter might be happy with that kind of man but seriously, do you think that kind of relationship will be of benefit to her? These days we get into relationships for more than just love but for personal, spiritual & professional growth & development.
What I see in that picture, however, is the kind of guy who won’t be helping your daughter grow any further in her professional or spiritual life. To me, it looks like the kinda man who would be introducing her to the latest bizarre things in town & the only meetings they’ll be at are probably ones about where the baddest party in town is.
Now, that moment when you are excited about your man’s circle & its strength & who he’s likely to introduce you to & their impact on your relationship, I guess with such a relationship, the people your man meets up with are those who’ll be telling him about the latest girl in town & probably how he can smash her on the side as long as you don’t find out. One of them would even likely be willing to let him do it at their joint for free. That’s if his friends are not rolling joints with him in their free time.
So, if my daughter comes to me that she’s found a man who’s making her happy & she presents this, we shall have a serious talk about her future. Those things of “she’s an adult so she decides what she wants” will stop those ends.
If you, who’s reading this, still help your partner, who’s an adult in making decisions that you think will be better for the two of you, why not I have the right to make some for my own child?
That’s my sermon for today.